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Author Topic: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.  (Read 7384 times)

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Jenova

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A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« on: December 03, 2007, 02:14:16 PM »

Guess what this is about? Yes, Cheech and Chong still really hate each other, not matter what I try. I'm sorry this is a long post but I want to try and explain everything. I know Chong isn't happy and I may need to take some drastic action. :(

Firstly these are the methods of getting them together we have tried and the results that followed.

Swapping cages for a few hours a day - Chong loves Cheech's big cage and plays about in it. Cheech gets aggravated in Chong's smaller cage and chews on the bars. Chong's cage was only meant to be temporary until they were together in the bigger one.
Letting them out in the room to play together - Cheech ignores Chong and goes about her daily routine of trying to get everywhere she's not meant to be. Chong stalks her and tries to get on her back and mate with her. She barks harshly at him and usually grabs a mouthful of fur. he retreats only to try... again and again and again... she eventually gets mad with him and chases him around the room and I have to put them both back in their cages.
Putting them together in a tiny neutral cage - it's actually a mouse cage with all the shelves removed. They fly around after each other growling like rabid fur balls. Chong stands on his hind legs in the corner growling and Cheech gets bored and tries to find a way out of the small cage instead. When she goes near him he growls at her, she turns her back to him. Sometimes he tries to mate with her and she will attack him until he gets scared again. After a while she will initiate the fight and pins him to the floor. She sits on top of him and appears to be grooming him. She seems a little rough to me and sometimes he squeaks and wriggles out of her hold. Sometimes they pee on each other too. After maybe half an hour they sit on either side of the cage and ignore each other and go to sleep.
Putting them together in Chong's cage - Cheech hoards all of his stuff and sits in his box, they fight and pee on each other. Cheech also bites Chong's toes through the mesh floor so I never put them in there again. :(
Putting them together in Cheech's cage (with both boxes in there) - They fight. Cheech commandeers Chong's box. Chong sits on or in Cheech's box and barks and growls whenever she comes near. She is much more aggressive to him but because of they layout they can't really get each other and they end up asleep, apart.

The mouse cage is usually the best option. We put them in there once every couple of days. All the methods have been tried at different times of the day, with a day or more in between.
The main problems I've found: Chong will not stop trying to mate with Cheech. She doesn't want anything to do with that and will be quite vicious in stopping him, but he never learns. I thought Chinchillas were meant to be intelligent but he never learns. Chong is also so scared of her and barks and growls whenever she comes near. And the other problem is that Cheech, although she doesn't seem to mind him at first, after a while of Chong's attacks and barking, can be really vicious towards him and won't let up until she's sitting on him.

But when Chong is in his cage all he does is pine for her. He moves his nesting box to get closer to her cage and sits there and makes pining noises. I've looked up the sounds on the internet and he's lonely. He doesn't play as much as her and to be honest I know he's just not happy and it breaks my heart. He's from a breeder and he's used to being around chinchillas all the time and it's upsetting him being on his own, but I'm just out of ideas to get them together.

This is my moral dilemma. I don't want to keep Chong in this situation. It isn't fair. He isn't happy and so we're not happy (while Cheech is as happy as ever). These are the options I can see for us at the moment:

Keep trying. Put them together ever day or so and maybe eventually they will learn to like each other. Most people tell me chinchillas will learn to like each other rather than live alone and it can take years. But in that time I'll know Chong isn't happy.
Get Chong castrated. It should stop him trying to mate with Cheech and therefore will stop her being aggressive to him but obviously this option has a lot of downfalls. The obvious one being how dangerous it is to operate on a chinchilla, but also it may not even solve the problem. And of course we will never have Cheech and Chong babies (but I doubt that will happen anyway). I don't want to do this to him, but if it has a good chance of solving the problem I would do it. But then I might find out Cheech was the problem and I put him through the risk for nothing.
The last option I can think of and the most horrible one for me is to let him live with another Chinchilla where he will finally be happy. I love him so much, he's my little baby, but I would be willing to give him up if I knew it meant he could be happy. I would put an ad around and he would have a trial week with the prospective mate and if it didn't work I would take him back.

I'm so confused at the moment. Cheech seems to be happy enough alone at the moment but I just know Chong isn't. Does anyone have any advice for me? Thank you for reading my essay. :)

ChinchillAZ

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #1 on: December 03, 2007, 02:55:37 PM »

This probably isn't what you want to hear, but...

Whenever you get a second chinchilla, there is ALWAYS the possibility that they will not get along and will not be able to be housed together.  From what you are describing, I would personally determine that they were not going to get along and would keep them separated.  Castrating your male does not guarantee that his personality will change to the point where he will get along with the female.  He may still have a dominant personality and she may still have a dominant personality and getting two dominants to get along is very difficult, if not impossible.  If this were me and my chinchillas, I would purchase another large cage and have two cages with two happy chinchillas who live separate lives forever.

Jenova

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #2 on: December 03, 2007, 04:10:30 PM »

Thank you for your advice. I'd be happy having them separately if only I knew it would make Chong happy but all he does is pine for Cheech so I don't know if he is.

ChinchillAZ

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #3 on: December 03, 2007, 05:17:43 PM »

Perhaps his cage could be moved to another room where he wouldn't find the female to be such a temptation.

Jenova

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #4 on: December 03, 2007, 10:05:58 PM »

That could work. We keep them in the bedroom with us though, and that's where we spend most of our free time, our PC and TV are in the bedroom, so they are always getting a lot of attention. That's the other thing, Chong doesn't like to be touched. He doesn't like to be stroked or tickled, so he doesn't get as much attention as Cheech either (who will stretch herself up against the cage for a tickle). I make sure I spend time tickling him and picking him up each day in case it's just something he has to get used to. But moving him out would mean he would be completely on his own. Also, our bedroom is the only room with an air conditioner.

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #5 on: December 04, 2007, 12:44:13 AM »

I don't know what to tell you...  Another A/C can always be purchased, but, seeing as how he's still getting used to you, you might consider moving her out of the room instead.

Jenova

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #6 on: December 04, 2007, 07:56:11 AM »

Thanks for the advice. :)

Leslie

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #7 on: December 17, 2007, 03:16:26 PM »

Hi Jenova

I am feeling your pain because I got a second chinchilla a while back with the hopes he would get along with my other guy and I quickly realized there was absolutely no way they were going to co-habitate.  In retrospect, we probably should have known better because our original chin is very temperamental and not social at all.  We thought another chin might draw him out of his shell.  Also, he had lived with other chins in the pet store we got him from, but that was years before we got the second guy.

They snapped at each other from the start and under supervision outside the cage they just chased each other and mounted each other and peed on each other.  It was really scary.  I didn't dare try putting them in a small box together cause I'm pretty sure they would have just gone at it and we wouldn't have been able to separate them before someone got hurt.

We were however prepared for the worst and we accepted that we have two cages and twice the work.  Which really isn't that bad after all.

I don't know if the one you think is lonely is really as lonely as you think.  What about his behavior makes you think he's sad?  I think chins are normally quite happy alone, especially with lots of love and attention from you.  Can you put the cages kind of close so they can at least see each other but not bite at each other?  They'd at least have some company when you're not around and they wouldn't feel alone.  I know that chins are not the same as dogs, but have you seen the Dog Whisperer?  He is always talking about how humans have these stories in their minds about the animals and their thought patterns, when really animals are quite simple.  But if you treat them like they are sad and depressed, they feed off that.  And if he does miss cage mates, he might just need some time to adjust to solitary cage life?

I don't think putting them together every day is very good for them, because they seem to have memories like elephants, and the stress will get to them and affect their personalities. 

I really hope you don't have to give one away.  That would be the last option for me.  And I wouldn't consider surgery at all, ever ever ever.

Just my two cents.  Good luck!
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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #8 on: December 17, 2007, 04:54:38 PM »

Even if they cannot be the best of friends, its not saying that individually they are not both great pets. In time they will get use to each other's presence, that just doesn't mean they will be friends. It took my Petie a good year to get completely comfy here, and now he is the best chin we could ever ask for! Well......Except when the females go into heat. I can't let him out or he will attack me if I come in the room. He is my only male that does that, but he bit me in the butt one time and attacked my pants the second time. I have learned my lesson though!
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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #9 on: December 17, 2007, 08:26:55 PM »

sometimes you just have to keep them seperate. Some chins just don't get along...kinda like people.
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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #10 on: December 18, 2007, 02:02:28 PM »

Thank you all for your replies!
Chong is so lovely I don't think I could really give him away. I only think he's lonely because he doesn't play as much in his cage as Cheech does. She chews at anything and everything and he mostly just sits in his favourite place or sleeps in his box, hardly touching his toys. The cages are right next to each other and he will sit next to her cage and make a pining noise. She flirts with him, running up to where he's sitting and stretches right up in front of him, does a little jump and hops off. He squeaks and wiggles his tail. Cheech is such a tease. I'm sure she's get on fine with him if he didn't try to mate with her all the time! She's fine with all animals, when she's in her ball she chases the dog and the rabbit about and they run off knowing how much a speeding chinchilla in a 15 inch ball hurts when it hits you. :)

I'm keeping him, I love my little Chong too much. He can have the smaller cage until he's a year old like Cheech did and then I'll get him a bigger one. It's not that small, it's got two stories and is just under a metre tall with all sorts of wooden ledges and tunnels and dangly things. What I really want to get him is a wheel because he loves the ball so much, I just can't afford one right now.

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #11 on: December 20, 2007, 09:16:54 AM »

 ::silly::  Not from an expert ... not by a long shot, but, from someone wilh lots of experience  (we have 200+ chins)

    All chinchillas have their own personality, just like people do.  AND just like people, sometimes personalities can conflict ... not only between chinchillas, but also between a chinchilla and a human.

(1) The female chinchilla, when mating, is often rough and is usually the dominate one.  Their mating may get a bit of fur flying, but there should never be any signs of broken skin or blood.

(2) Mounting is not always a sexual thing ... it is also a way two chinchillas (even of the same sex) decide which one is the alpha/#1/boss chin.  CAUTION: Between two chinchillas with strong dominate personalities, fights often occur ... many times to-the-death or severe damage to one or both chinchillas.  If there is ever a sign of broken skin or blood ... I would NEVER put them back together, most likely, you would eventually find one dead.  In the meantime, you are only feeding the hate and fear between them.  It may eventually make one a permenent bully and one constantly living in fear of any other chinchilla, for the rest of it's natural life.  Does that sound a bit drastic?  Yes, but it is a fact, and it can be very dangerous/detrimental to one or both chins.

(3) Some chinchillas are just VERY picky about their mate.  We had one chin that went through 3 breeders, in as many years, (I was breeder #3).  He did not like other chinchillas or humans ... not even one.  After numerous failures to find a mate Jack liked ( he would not fight them, just ignor them ), we introduced Miss Daisy to him ... instantly ... like turning on a lilght switch ... he had found his one-true-love ... he loved every body and every thing, even humans!   Sadly, 5 years later Jack passed away ... now, after 2 years, Miss Daisy has refused every mate and/or cage mate offered to her.  We hope to eventually find a friend or mate for her.

    Personal opinion ... you are only making things worse by trying to force them to like/love each other.  Think of someone in your life you can not stand to even be around ... think how you would feel if you had to spend the rest of your life with them next to you constantly ... this is the situation you have one the or both of two chins in, now.  Have you ever loved someone that did not love you back ... it was no fun being shunned ... this may also be a situation one of the two are in now.  Neither are really happy.

I would get each it's own cage and find a mate for the one that wants a mate ... who knows ... you may luck out and find a mate for one, and that one may also turn out to be a play buddy for the other chin.   :)

Good luck!   ::nod::

 ::wave::  Jo Ann
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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2007, 01:57:30 AM »

I know what you are feeling.  I have some chins that will just never get along with eachother but I can put them with other chins!! they are just like people some people you will never like no matter what. and with your male not used to be caged with anyone he is more than likely mounting her to be dominent and not so much to mate.  He may just like being by himself.  When I buy a chin to place them with someone I always have the other breeder I am buying from have a experimental play night.  If the one I plan to cage with the other gets a long then its all good if they dont get along then I have to find someone that will get along with them.  Its trial and error, there is always a 50/50 chance. Experimental Play nights before you buy the chin is great because it saves you and your chin stress! ::silly::
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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #13 on: December 28, 2007, 06:14:14 PM »

Experimental Play nights before you buy the chin is great because it saves you and your chin stress! ::silly::
But Experimental Play nights do leave your chinchilla exposed to potential illness.  A 30 day quarantine period should be observed between chinchillas and this would completely eliminate this quarantine.

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Re: A moral dilema - I really need some advice.
« Reply #14 on: December 28, 2007, 06:41:23 PM »

 ::silly::  I could not agree more ... if a breeder takes a strange chin into her own chinchilla area without a quarentine time ... she/he has no idea what they may be exposing their chinchillas to ... and you do not know what you may be exposing your chin to.    ::think::

 ::wave::  Jo Ann
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