My bedroom is cold, in order to keep my little Popsicle healthy.
Unfortunatly, this has some unwanted side effects. For instance, Popsicle tries to breastfeed from me every now and then. OUCH. (I'm a guy, BTW)
After the latest nibbling, I decided threats were in order.
"POPSICLE! If you do that again, you're going to share the fate of all those farmed Chinchillas! I'm going to turn you into a fur hat!!!"
...
Result:
http://prntscr.com/2xu6trPosicle: "SQUEEK! I'm soft and furry, I make a GREAT fur hat!"
Me: You obviously misunderstand me...
Popsicle: I understand everything! I am a rodent GENIUS!!! ... oh, look, there's a pellet on the floor. I wonder if it tastes delicious? ... oh, it tastes like my poo poo... ah, I see! That must mean... it *IS* my poo poo!!! ... I am a rodent GENIUS!!!
Me: ... sigh... you win again, Popsicle...